Fume Rite, 3: When the smoke clears….

“There are two of you, you see: one that loves and one that kills.”

 

My torrid love affair with Apocalypse Now began in my high school AP English class.  We watched it after school as a companion to Joseph Conrad’s Heart of Darkness, which I was currently in engaged in a dark humid muddy affair.  Apocalypse Now has always been associated with smoking for me.  Before my first viewing, my friend Matt and I slipped up the road to his house to get high (he lived two minutes from school) while his mom went to McDonald’s to get us munchies (because she was that kind of mom).  Then after the movie, we smoked cigarettes as we walked back to his house to get stoned again.  From the very first strains of “The End”, I knew that Apocalypse Now and I were going to be very close.  ”The End” was already one of my favorite fuck songs/cutting songs/getting high to/ getting drunk to/belly dancing songs, so it was only natural that anything that it introduced to me was going to become an intimate companion.

Later on that same year I had my own fan allusion, where I came to out of a Rimeron haze lying on my living room floor watching the fan go around and around, just like Huey blades.

Apocalypse Now is a very sexy movie.  The artistry of the cinematography.  The eye candy interwoven with the blood and grit.  The jokes and idiosyncrasies of war.  The absolute brilliant and elegant script.  It’s the total poetic package.

As you all know, I’m a gritty kind of girl, so the blood, guts, and mud, hooked me and made my clit twitch.  And then you get towards the end of the movie, and the Pagan overtones start to become obvious with the Cult of Kurtz.  By the end of the movie, how could you not want to bathe yourself in buffalo blood and fuck Martin Sheen while he’s stuck in a bamboo cage or tied up in a very compromising auto-erotic asphyxiation position with a buddy’s head in his lap?  I can’t help but lust after his machete.  The dual sacrifices set everything in the world back on track.  The killing of a god.



And then like your girl friend getting breast enhancements, it got even better and the “Redux” version came out, and I fell even more helplessly in love.  I can understand how sitting in a theater through the whole uncut movie could be a bit much, but some of the best parts, my absolute favorite part, were not included in the original film.  After wrapping myself up in the luscious smokiness of the “Redux” the original is sorely lacking.

And smoke is everywhere in both versions of the film.  The army and navy and air cav are constantly igniting colored smoke bombs to obscure view in a literal smoke screen and to signal to the forces and helicopters.  Scene after scene is filled with the smoke of napalmed trees and bombed villages.  Willard is almost never seen without a cigarette in his mouth.  The “Street Gang” crew crouches down in the turret to smoke pot.  Kilgore (is that not just the most perfect character name for this movie?) has his cigarette in his “man” length holder and then later on smokes cigars with his surf crew.

And now we’re to my favorite section of the “Redux” version: The French rubber plantation.  I love the brunette, “Claudine” who feeds the Elder de Marais.  She is such an exotic beauty.  Her features hint of mixed blood, like an illicit affair behind a rubber tree, but she is so intoxicating, that the indiscretions of her ancestors can be forgiven.

Then you have Madame Sarrault, who while she’s not a smoking beauty, she is a beauty who smokes, from after dinner cigars to opium.

My favorite is her pressed naked against the mosquito netting with Willard reaching up to cup her breast.  It turns me on every time.

If you’ve never seen Apocalypse Now, it’s worth the however many hours of your life it takes to watch it. If you think you’re not going to like it, drink while you watch it.  Willard drinks through out the entire film.

Paying the Bills and the Giveaway and a party

Sign Up Today!

The Yule Gift Guide–Reserve your spot today: http://barbedpentacle.com/barbed-pentacle-yule-gift-guide/

Be a Party Sponsor: http://barbedpentacle.com/sponsors-click-click-click-click-click/party-sponsor/

General Advertising: http://barbedpentacle.com/sponsors-click-click-click-click-click/209-2/

Parties: http://barbedpentacle.com/events/

 a Rafflecopter giveaway

Fume Rite, 1: Chasing a Pillar of Smoke

I’ve written about smoking here some time back.  It was mainly about pot, as I recall.  Or maybe it wasn’t.  Who knows?  Like most things in life, smoking is extremely sexy and it will kill you.  Not only is it sexually stimulating to me when I see people really enjoying a cigarette or cigar (not just mindlessly smoking because they can’t control themselves), but it’s sexually stimulating to me when I smoke a cigarette (or these days an ehookah).  And it’s not just the nicotine stimulating brain chemicals, it’s the act of inhalation, drawing the smoke into your mouth and lungs and manipulating it once it’s in your body.

From start to finish, it gets me sopping.  The flick of a nice, REAL lighter is like a lover breathing lightly on my neck.

 And then the orgasm of it all are the smoking tricks.  My favorite is the French Inhale.  I enjoy doing it, but I like it even better if it’s executed by the other party.  It’s like I can just almost feel the smoker going down on me by extension of the smoke.  

 It is as complicated as it looks, but like most tricks some folks can do it the first go round and some folks just never get the hang of it.  It can be done with any kind of smoke, including vapor, although it’s a harder with vape.  Here’s a great how-to video for the French Inhale and other Tricks.

I’ve always been fascinated with smoking.  I grew up in a smoking household.  It was there and visible.  I grew up in tobacco country, where the notion that smoking was a health hazard was for the most part scoffed at.  I started smoking when I was 14 because, as I stated earlier, it excited me sexually, especially when I saw it in black and white movies.  I’ve been an occasional, recreational, social smoker ever since.

I first became acquainted with the “real” ritualistic use of smoking in modern times at a Fume Rite exhibit in college.  It was staged, picture by picture, like an art exhibit, but it was one of those exhibits that the artistic merit wasn’t so much in the how-to drawings, but in the actual execution of the ritual itself.  Had it actually been carried out, it would have resembled a Japanese tea ceremony.  Of course the irony was that it was hung in a “no smoking” gallery.  I’m currently working on chasing a pillar of smoke to find out more about Fume Rite.  As it is now, I’m working off of memories a decade old and no internet leads.

So, if you’d like to help, and you know something about Fume Rite (which I want to say was celebrated on April 15 and October 15), please email me at chirpatsparrow@gmail.com.  If you don’t know anything, but you’d still like to help, then find something smokey to inhale and say a prayer that the information comes my way.  Societies all around the world, including the Roman Catholic church, believe that prayers are carried to heaven via smoke (and I believe in our modern times vapor).  If you just can’t bring yourself to inhale, choose a nice incense, preferably frankincense because it’ll give you a little mild bit of hallucinatory buzz if burned in an unventilated environment, and burn it with your prayers.

 

 

Feed Your Head, Part 2: Divining the Smoke

Salvia divinorum, or Diviner’s Sage, is the next stop on our fairly legal herbal journey. Many of you will be familiar with the small packages of the dried green leaves at smoke shops and metaphysical stores, or having it passed around a bale fire at a Pagan event–which is not quite as wonderful as getting multiple pipes and joints passed to you at a Dead concert. The smoke blend is relatively cheap and easy to obtain, and it is a good “gateway” ritual substance.

Like many mildly hallucinogenic plants, Diviner’s Sage is originally from Mexico. In most areas of the *United States, Diviner’s Sage is legal. However, the state of Delaware has made it completely illegal due to Brett’s Law, which is a stupid law right out of “Reefer Madness.”

While most people who take Diviner’s Sage smoke it in a pipe, the herb can be chewed fresh and held in the cheek like snuff. It can also be made into a tea or tincture. Www.sagewidom.org/usersguide.com is a good place to go for free information on everything Diviner’s Sage. It has some particularly helpful tips on propagation and storage. The two main points of the guide are use the sage in private–never in public–and to always have a babysitter. I’m not sure I fully agree with those points, but they are good things to keep in mind.

In my own experience with Diviner’s Sage, I felt somewhere between mildly stoned and extremely tipsy after smoking several bowls. I used it in a sweat lodge ritual, and it worked really well for that. It’s also good for trances, meditations, oracle work, ecstatic dances, and aspecting deities. As with all substances of this nature, all participants should be of legal age and no one should operate a vehicle while under the influence.

If you’d like to add an extra divinatory dimension to your smoking experience, you can try out the ancient art of libanomancy.  Libanomancy is divining the future through incense smoke.  If it blows one way, it means something.  If it blows another way, it means something else.  Even though this practice traditionally uses incense resin dropped on hot charcoal, it’s very easily adaptable to smoke rising from a pipe.  Check out http://www.angelfire.com/tx/tintirbabylon/libano.html for the meanings that the ancient Babylonians gave to smoke’s behavior.

 *THE UNITED STATES: Salvia divinorum is classified as a controlled substance in the states of Delaware, Florida, Illinois, Kansas, Kentucky, Mississippi, Missouri, North Dakota, Ohio, Oklahoma, South Dakota, and Virginia. Salvia divinorum is also illegal in the states of Louisiana and Tennessee, but only if intended for human consumption. A local law prohibits possession of Salvia divinorum in Suffolk County, New York. Salvia divinorum is entirely legal in all other states.

These folks give sage advice:

The Geeky Kink Event http://thegeekykinkevent.com/

Tonia Brown www.thebackseatwriter.com

Chris Eagle Music http://chriseaglemusic.weebly.com/

Erotic Sensations http://eroticsensations.us/

Passion And Soul: http://passionandsoul.com/

Squeeze My Melons and Plow My Furrow, Part 5: What Zombies Like to Eat

Zombies like to eat people, and not in the same why that I like to eat people.  They like to eat fresh, live people. According to Wiccan author Tonia Brown, who has made a name for herself in the horror, zombie, steam punk, and smut genres, zombies will also eat other live animals.  The key word here, though, is live.
Zombies historically have been cannibals.  As humans, we have a deep aversion to cannibalism, even when it’s done for absolute survival and the cannibalized person died of natural causes.  Why is this?  Is it because if we engage in cannibalism then we give in to our primal selves and become more animal-like than human-like?  Other animals engage in cannibalism, why shouldn’t we?

There are many cultures around the world that engage in different forms of cannibalism, from straight up killing your neighbor and putting him on the grill, to eating a dead monk’s brain to ingest his knowledge, to smoking a cremated relative’s ashes.  On a recent episode of Shameless, Frank and Monica smoked Grammy Gallagher’s cremated remains.

I’ve smoked remains before, as well as eaten them in brownies and drank them in Cuba Libres.  It’s a little gritty, on a lot of different levels, but considering all the things they do with cremated remains now (even packing them into empty ammo casings), it’s really not that odd.  What better way to honor a dead friend than to make them part of your body and engage in some sorta legal cannibalism?


Moral discussions about cannibalism, as well as the usual quest for food, is an all consuming drive in Tonia Brown’s new novel, Bad Ass Zombie Road Trip.

The novel is about two guys, Dale and Jonah , who fancy themselves musicians. On the way to a gig, things pretty much go to Hell in a beat up Ford Focus on the side of an interstate in California. Anyone who has been to or lived in California knows that the interstates there are Hell, so it should come as no surprise that the handsome devil Lucifer is roaming the asphalt. In a series of unfortunate, profanity laden events, things go from bad to worse as Jonah is swallowed up by a whale of a situation. The boys end up on a cross-country race against the clock to recover the most precious thing that Dale possesses (and it’s not his penis). Along the way, the boys learn that it’s almost impossible to outwit the Devil, they pick up a stripper named Candy, and they learn about the weird toilet phenomena that happens when a zombie eats human food.

This is a perfect electronic read for your spring break beach adventure or your summer road trip to visit the numerous over-priced Pagan festivals that are being planned as you read this review. Its light, raunchy prose will keep you amused and slightly aroused for hours on in while you bake yourself in the sand and sun or pretend to be interested in some over-hyped Pagan expert that charges several hundred dollars an hour to tell you how wiping your ass is no longer healthy and that Gaea doesn’t approve of Charmin toilet paper.

The only negative thing that I have to say about this novel is that Candy does not come across as a genuine Carolina girl. If she were really from the Carolinas then she would never have told the boys that to people who live on the board between North and South Carolina, that it doesn’t really matter which state you say you’re from. Yes it does Candy! It matters a great deal! As someone who has lived in both Carolinas, you learn from an early age that each state thinks it’s better than the other one. To people in South Carolina, everyone from North Carolina is in-bred and a redneck. To people in North Carolina, everyone in South Carolina is a snob and a crook. They’re very different places, Miss Candy. How about you don’t get caught in the rain and melt as you try to decided which Carolina you’re from, sugar foot!

For more information on real zombies, check out Zora Neale Hurston’s Tell My Horse. To purchase a copy of Bad Ass Zombie Road Trip visit: http://www.amazon.com/Badass-Zombie-Road-Trip-ebook/dp/B006ZAJ4M4.

Check out these awesome folks:
Sub-shop.com   http://bit.ly/subshop
Tonia Brown  www.thebackseatwriter.com