Nails and other detritus: A Pagan Service Announcement

The proper disposal of nail clippings and other personal detritus has become a major problem in the Pagan community.  Improper disposal of personal detritus can lead to you being placed in a jar on somebody’s shelf, having a poppet made of you, or being framed for a crime you didn’t commit.  You don’t want a poppet made of you, do you?

No, I didn’t think so, nor do you want to be singing the song, “But that’s not really my DNA” to the police.  They never believe you.  Not only is improper disposal of personal detritus gross, but it’s irresponsible.  Personal detritus is the easiest way for another magically inclined person to have control over you.

There are several proper ways to dispose of personal detritus.  First of all, make sure to collect all your nail clippings, loose hair (even from shower drains), pieces of dead skin or scabs, and boogers for proper disposal.  If you make this a daily habit, then the threat of someone controlling you will be greatly diminished.

Now it’s time to dispose of the detritus.  You can burn the waste and scatter the ashes.  You can bury the waste.  You can flush the waste.  My favorite is to let it all fly out of the car window as I’m speeding down the road.

To summarize, get your detritus out of your enemies’ hands and back to nature where it can decompose.
These folks always properly dispose of nail clippings:

The Nyx Oracle

Nyx is the Greek goddess of the night.  In our modern mythology, the character of Elvira is probably the best embodiment of this ancient archetype.  Born from Chaos, Nyx is both creatrix and a destroyer.  She can bring pain and unhappiness, or she can soothe it all away under the cover of darkness.

Nyx is the mother of Sleep, Death, Atmosphere, Day, Blame, Doom, Death, Dreams, the Fates, Retribution, Deception, Friendship, Age, Strife, and according to some texts, Love.  She was also known to operate as an oracle from the depths of a cave.  Outside of the cave, ecstatic dances took place while the petitioners waited for their answers.

Nyx Oracle Ritual

This ritual can be rewritten for a solitaire or a couple, but it works best in a small to large group.  One person needs to volunteer to be Nyx.  This position should not be taken lightly.  The person doesn’t have to be female, but he or she should be very comfortable with a goddess taking over their body, should be at least vaguely familiar with Nyx, and should not be opposed to bondage nor claustrophobic.
Timing:  Obviously, this is a night time ritual.  The best time to do it would be the dark of the moon.  That way Selene is not competing for attention.
Materials: Hood (for Nyx), mugwort or other such divinatory incense, pen and paper, drums or other instruments, absinthe (it’s worth the time and money to hunt down the real stuff–not the cheap stuff a lot of places sell.  For more info on absinthe:, and pieces of rope to bind “Nyx” with that will represent her children.
The Ritual: Before the ritual, “Nyx” needs to decide if the oracle will be received after a long ritual or if the oracle will be received during sleep via dreams.  If the second option is the case, then a tent needs to be set up for Nyx in the ritual space and a babysitter appointed since Nyx will still be in bondage.
Set up your outdoor ritual space as you normally would.  Light a large censor or several small ones and place the mugwort on it.  The smoke should completely fill the ritual space.  Now pass the absinthe around several times, including Nyx in the rotation.  Don’t forget to libate to Nyx as well.  Next, bring Nyx forward into the middle of the circle.  An invocation to Nyx should be said, either by one person or the group.  The invocation can be original or borrowed.  As Nyx is invoked, the hood should be placed over Nyx’s head and that person should open him or herself up to the Goddess, allowing the Goddess to take over.
Now the group needs to decide and settle on three or four of Nyx’s children that have been bringing them the most problems.  More can be selected, but three or four is a good number.
Now, it’s the bondage rigger’s turn.  The bondage for this ritual can be simple or fancy.  For each rope, the rigger should say the following as Nyx is tied up: “Nyx, your child_____________, has been giving us problems.  I bind your child ___________to you and ask that you tell us how to deal with the problems caused by your child.”
If Nyx is not going to be sleeping, then he or she needs to be helped to a sitting or lying down position if he or she has been left standing.  If Nyx is going to be sleeping, then Nyx needs to be helped into the tent.  Either way, the baby sitter should stay close to Nyx with pen and paper to write down the oracle message.  As the participants wait for the messages, they should feel free to drink more, dance, and play music.  The energy raised from the music and dancing aids “Nyx” to make more of a connection with Nyx.  
Once the ritual is over, either because the oracle has spoken or because Nyx has woken up, Nyx and her children need to be released.  This can be done in a reverse manner than the children were bound to her.
“Nyx, thank you for your wisdom.  We now release you and and your child_________.  We release your child __________ from our lives.”  As the child is released, the rope for that child is untied.
After Nyx has been completely unbound, make sure to say a prayer of thanks to Nyx for her presence at the ritual.  The person who was Nyx is probably going to need some aftercare, such as food, coffee, and a willing ear to listen.

These folks know Nyx too:
Erotic Sensations

Multiple love, not multiple bastards

Polyamory. I’m sure by just reading that one word you already have an opinion formed. Monogamy is a much easier relationship arrangement than polyamory, even if you have trouble being monogamous. 

 In a true polyamorous relationship, all the partners involve have to strive to make sure that everyone gets equal time and attention with everyone else involved and that jealousy and strife are kept to a minimum. From personal experience, I can assure you that giving equal time to everyone and keeping jealous thoughts and actions at a minimum is much easier typed than done.

Polyamory, and other such free love concepts like open relationships and swinging, also entail a great deal of responsibility. The lovers involved have the responsibility of fidelity, emotional support and integrity, and contraception–for both the prevention of disease and children. I’ve noticed that a lot of Pagans, in particularly men but not always, think “oh, we’re all about nature and such we don’t need condoms” or they leave it all up to the woman (which just seems to be a universal male tendency). 

 Or, which is more truthful, the people involve just don’t care. When this happens, you end up with a lot of unexpected children that often are not financially or emotionally supported by the father. I’ve been hearing about this more and more in the community and it bothers me. Polyamory does not mean that you can leave a trail of bastards behind you as you bounce from one festival to another or even one group to another. 

 It does not mean that you can sprinkle your seed across the land like dandelion down, nor does it mean, ladies, that children should pop up like mushrooms every time you spread your legs. It’s not that hard to take 10 minutes to be responsible! If you can’t afford children, then you need to save up for at least condoms and spermicide (and don’t just use the spermicide dumbasses! I’ve heard that excuse too!) if not morning after pills as well.
I don’t know how the law operates in other states and countries, but in North Carolina if you don’t pay your child support, your ass ends up in jail. Now, to be fair, the way that the child support rate is figured is not always just to the paying party (which is not always the father), and if the paying parent’s circumstances change, it’s usually next to impossible to get that rate decreased. However, in most cases, I have very little sympathy when mommas and daddies end up in jail for not paying child support, especially when the child was born completely out of any sort of wedlock or other serious or religious relationship, and you owe on more than one child by more than one partner. Suck it up and take your month in jail or go get a fucking job and stop fucking everything that moves!

Misdemeanors at the Altar: 2nd blog for The Pagan Values Blogject

I don’t believe that Wiccan clergy in particular, and Pagan clergy in general, should have set fees for their services. I think love offerings are wonderful if the person receiving a service wants to offer one, and I think that within reason now that gas prices are exorbitant, it’s acceptable to ask for a little bit of money for gas if you have to drive farther than 30 miles or so.
Why am I opposed to clergy asking for payment? For one thing, being a priest or a priestess is a calling that should not under any circumstances hinge on being paid. If you’ve truly have been called to be clergy, then the thought of posting a fee schedule is probably abhorrent. Religion is not a business. The other reason why I’m very much opposed to clergy asking for money for their services is that the vast majority of Pagan clergy do not have any sort of divinity degree. They’re not professionals, although they should always strive to act in a professional manner. If, for example, a priest/priestess has a divinity degree from an accredited institution (which Cherry Hill Seminary, unfortunately, is not yet), then I can maybe see a small stipend being offered to the person by the organization that they serve. But the bottom line is that living off of those that you serve is wrong.
Many Wiccans, and to a certain extend some Pagans, tend to follow only one rule when it comes to morals: “‘An it harm none, do as thou will.” While this seems like a simple enough thing to comprehend on the surface, it’s an extremely complicated and complex notion. I’ve noticed that a lot of Wiccans do not apply the Wiccan Rede to their treatment of Pagan clergy, and maybe it’s because payment is usually not requested.
If a clergy person is down to earth and ethical, I’ve noticed that many Pagans feel that they can walk all over them. They treat their clergy in a way that they would have never treated their Christian clergy (yes, I did just make that sweeping statement because it’s a statistical fact that a majority of the Pagans in America were previously Christian). If a clergy person is aloof, haughty, and unethical, then an undeserved respect seems to be bestowed upon them. Maybe it’s because the person just expects respect instead of working to deserve it. I guess it works along the lines that if two items are placed side by side, one of inferior quality and one of excellent quality, and the inferior one is priced higher than the good quality one, the inferior product almost always sells out before the low priced, good quality product does.
As a priestess, the most common form of disrespect that I’ve encountered is people contacting me for services–usually a handfasting–and then jilting me at the altar after I’ve done a lot of work on their behalves. Sometimes I’ve already gotten handfastingcords to them and rearranged my schedule when I’m notified that my services are no longer needed. The quotes below are from actual emails that I’ve received.  Unfortunately, the quotes below are only a sampling.  I could publish a small book full of the jilted altar emails that I’ve received.  If you see a quote from an email that you’ve sent me, then I hope you’re suitably embarrassed and that it rained during your handfasting ceremony.
Before we continue, I want to make it clear that none of these emails are from people that are members of my religious organizations. The type of disrespect that I’ve received from them is usually more along the lines of what you expect from rude teenagers whose mommas didn’t beat them enough when they were growing up. It’s nothing that half an hour on my X-beam wouldn’t fix!  

(Names have been changed.)
“Hey! I am interested in talking to you about doing a handfasting/wedding type ceremony for us, we live in ++++++ near ++++++ and would come to the mountains preferrably. Please email me back a # or contact me via call or txt at +++++++.
Thank You!!
“Dear Tommy, What day, time, and location were you thinking about? I’m about 30 minutes from you. Did you want just a priestess or did you want a ceremony with a priest and a priestess.
Sparrow Brown”
“Hey Sparrow! Thank you for getting back with me, i didnt know it but a friend of mine who is Wiccan is ordained and said she would do the ceremony for us. It will be cool having her do it since i’ve known her for years. We are excited about it too!
Thanks again for getting back to me.
********************************************************************************* “Hello Sparrow, 
 My name is Christine. My fiance and I are planning a handfasting ceremony for July 14 in +++++++++. We live in ++++++ and own a piece of property in +++++++ and that is where we are planning on having the ceremony. Do your travel to +++++++ to preform ceremonies and are you available on July 14 of this year? We have just started looking for someone that would be able to preform the ceremony. 
 I look forward to hearing back from you, 
 ”Dear Christine I am available. Do you want just me, or would you like to have a priest present too? 
 Sparrow Brown” 
 ”Hi Sparrow, 
 Do you do legally recognized hand fasting ceremonies? We really only wanted to have one officiator present. How much do you charge to preform the ceremony? You are welcome to call me so that we can go over the details, my number is +++++++. 
 I look forward to hearing from you, 
 ”I am legal in the state of NC. In order to make it legal, you’ll need to get a marriage certificate from the county where the “wedding” is going to be held (++++++ Co.). The state doesn’t care what form the ceremony takes, as long as all the paper work is filled out and they get their money. I don’t charge anything for performing rituals, but if you feel lead to give a love offering, the money will be split between +++++++++ organization and +++++++++ organization. What time of day is good for calling? 
 ”Hi Sparrow, 
 So what you are saying is that I will need to get a marriage license and marriage certificate from +++++++ County? The license is obtained prior to the ceremony and the certificate is filled out after the ceremony and submitted to the County, is that correct? I am available by phone all day on Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays and Sundays. On Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays I am available after 6:00 PM. The exception to today is that I have an appointment at 4:00 this afternoon for about an hour. I look forward to hearing from you. Blessings, 
 ”Yes, that is correct. You and your fiance obtain the paper work from +++++++ County and pay them approximately $60, and then after the ceremony, I’ll fill out the paper work and you, your new husband, and two witnesses will sign it. And then you or me (it doesn’t matter which one) has about a month to turn it to make it legal. NC doesn’t have any waiting periods, so you could get the paper work Friday before the ceremony. I would just call to double check to make sure the county offices are going to be open. I don’t know about ++++++ County, but some counties only accept cash. This should help answer some of your questions: http://www.+++++++++ I’ll give you a call tomorrow afternoon, and we’ll get started hammering out the details. 
 ”Hi Sparrow, I just wanted to let tell you a little bit about what is going on on my end. About 4 weeks ago I contacted someone and asked if she would do our handfasting ceremony. She said yes and I reserved the date with her. She said that she would E-mail me some paperwork within a couple of days. After about 10 days she sent me another E-mail saying that she was really busy and would send me the information that afternoon. That was 3 weeks ago and I have not heard from her since. I called and E-mailed her a couple of times with no response. Last weekend I decided to start looking for someone else and that is when I contacted you. I contacted 10 people in total last weekend. I was a little nervous to put all of my eggs in one basket again and still not have an officiator for our ceremony. I have mailed the invitations, ordered the flowers and the food, so I was getting quite nervous about not having someone confirmed. So that brings me to now and I sorry to tell you that we have decided to go with someone else as officiator. Thank you for your responses to me, I really appreciate it.
 (A side note: I had switched things around in my schedule for this her.  I also did call her when I said that I would, and I received her voice mail.  This email arrived three days after I called.) 

*********************************************************************************”Hello Sparrow!
My fiance and I have been together for 8 years, we are looking to make it official tomorrow. There is so much more to this story but seeing as we’re short on time I have to skip it for now. It would mean so much to us if we could marry on Halloween. We’re not doing anything fancy, friends will be present, but we could come to you if it would be easier. Please let me know if you can help! 
Thank you,
 p.s. we’re in ++++++++++ nc, originally from ++++++++, we moved here at the start of the year” (Because of the Samhain holiday, I did not get this email until 3 days after they wanted their handfasting.) ********************************************************************************* 
I’ve talked to clergy people of other faiths, and they report that they do not generally have this problem.  The people that I talked to say that it’s not uncommon for couples to postpone a ceremony due to cold feet or to completely call off an engagement.  Some of these clergy people have a set fee, but most of them don’t, but accept love offerings, some of which gets personally pocketed and some of which gets turned in to their religious organization.  So, since many of the clergy folks of different faiths I’ve spoken to do not charge a fee, I’m inclined to think that it’s just Pagans behaving badly and being unappreciative and rude.  That’s really sad and unacceptable if we want to be taken seriously by the rest of the world.

Dear God, Please Fill My Chalice. Happy Beltane!

While a lot of modern Pagans tone down Beltane because of families and such and the whole fluffy bunny aspect of the current state of Paganism, Beltane is really all about sex.
The most obvious representation of the Great Rite, Hieros Gamos, and the importance of ritual mating at Beltane is the Maypole.
Remember, a May pole without a flowered wreath is just a hand job!  
I’ve seen a lot of wreathless May poles in the last few years, and I’m not sure why this trend has developed.  Perhaps it is ignorance or perhaps single people are just preparing the poles.
Beltane, like Samhain, is a time when the veil is thin.  While we typically think about ghosts and spirits coming through the veil at Samhain, Beltane is usually seen as a time for fairies.
Beltane also seems to be big with skyclad celebrants.  Of course the sexual nature of the holiday has a lot to do with the desire to forget clothing, but it’s also (in many areas) the first warm weather holiday.  It’s nice to feel the sun soaking into your naked skin.
Nakedness+Pagans=Body Paint  Go for a solid color theme, or explore your creativity and go for designs.  Here are some body paint ideas.

Beltane, like other cross-quarter holidays, is a fire festival.  Traditionally, live stock were driven between fires, and people jumped fires for luck.
At this time of year, you usually see the spinners:
And the dancers:
Beltane also seems to be the unofficial start to the festival season.  Of course, every poi spinner has to come out to show off.

They annoy me because they all seem to act like they’re something special and are really only enjoyable if I’m taking something that accentuation light trails.

While the Lord and Lady hook up during Beltane, many other couples do too.  In ancient times, it was customary for the young man to build a brush and flower bower to bed his chosen lady in.  This custom is still sweet and timeless today.
While you make love, feel your inner deity come through and connect to your partner’s inner deity.

May you experience fire, flowers, and an ecstatic May pole dance!

These folks like fire in their Beltane:
Erotic Sensations:

Intercourse in Ritual

“There is something so amazing about a sexual climax, where you are so engulfed by the sensations, that I think you actually transcend your own self and ego … and all that you identify with at that point, and [you] achieve a new level or consciousness that is totally pure.” –Martina

There’s tons of books and websites and workshops out there about sex magic and tantric sex.  That’s not what this entry is about.

Intercourse in ritual is a natural extension of Hieros Gamos, the sacred marriage and union of the God and Goddess.  There are many different ways that sex can be used in ritual to enhance the ritual and magic.  And sex, as it’s being used here, means with two or more people or solitary.  Masturbation works just as well as partnered sex.  Here’s a short, short run down of some different ideas to get you into the Beltane spirit.

Sex to call the quarters
Consider using different positions, toys, or acts to call in the elements and quarters.

Sex to Invoke the Lord and Lady
Consider using different positions or toys to invoke the God and Goddess.  If you’re having sex with a partner of the opposite sex/gender affiliation, when invoking the Goddess, the girl can be on top.  When invoking the God, guy on top.

Sex to raise energy
In many different sex magic traditions, sex is used to generate the energy behind the magic, with the spell being completed upon climax.

Literal Hieros Gamos
Instead of an athame and chalice, use your body as it was meant to be used!

If your tradition calls for libations to be poured during ritual, sexual fluids are a wonderful libation liquid and are much more meaningful than cheap wine.

Sex to ground
While sex can be used to raise energy, sex can also be used to dissipate energy.  As you climax, feel all that extra energy from ritual seep into the ground and leave your body.

Sex as the whole ritual
For those with stamina and creativity, sex can be the whole ritual act.  Foreplay can be used to call in the elements and invoke the Lord and Lady, food can be added in for cakes and ale, and climax after climax can be added in for magical acts, libations, and grounding.

Let my worship be within the heart that rejoices, for behold, all acts of love and pleasure are my rituals.

With the Lady’s words in mind, outdoor sex should be done on private property, no underage participants should be present at rituals that involve sex or sexual acts, and all sexual acts should be consensual.

These folks have sex in ritual:
Erotic Sensations:
Tonia Brown:

May You Never Thirst, Part 2: I’ll Bring the Hooch and You Bring the Cooch!

I always wanted a flower making machine!  For a lot of folks of a certain generation or folks who grew up in the Carolinas, most of our images of untaxed homemade liquor came from The Andy Griffin Show, old time NASCAR (before it crossed the Mississippi), and our grandparents.
In the spirit of full disclosure, my first experiences with moonshine was my grandmother telling me stories about her two older brothers bootlegging in their “peg leg” model T for a family they married into.  Evidently, they would come and hide at the house when the law was after them.  My grandmother remembered her mother bribing all the children with candy so they would not to talk to the police when they came to the door. Grandma always ended the stories with “But that’s not something we tell folks.  That poor girl couldn’t help her daddy was a bootlegger.”  Sorry Grandma.
Moonshine is not a thing of the past.  Any random viewing on cable or satellite TV will offering up several different television shows and documentaries on the practice, especially since the suicide of Popcorn Sutton.  Moonshine is still being made by lots of people: young and old; Pagan and Christian.  Mr. Mt. Dew is just such a distiller–former distiller.  While he started out Christian (like many of us), he’s followed a more or less Druidic path for the last four years.  He started out learning the family recipe for moonshine from his grandfather when he was a boy.  After his grandfather passed, Mr. Mt. Dew continued to distill for the next six years.
Mr. Mt. Dew has made it all, from bath tub gin to fruit brandies (just white liquor made from fruit) to corn liquor to wine and mead.  He use to raise some of the corn and fruit himself, but at other times the materials were outsourced.
Mr. Mt. Dew also incorporates whiskey and distilling into his religious practice. “I fully believe in using spirits in spiritual practice. Whether it be to honor, or show reverence, or to feel ‘closer’ to them. In almost all branches of religion, Pagan, Christian, etc. some form of wine, beer or other distilled spirit has always been used in ritual or ceremony. And in the process of making the alcohol, I feel an almost divinity, in the sense that it amazes me that I can take something of this earth and create something for pleasure, relaxation, and worship from it.”

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Distilling involves science, math, and common sense.  Without these things, you’re making poison. According to Mr. Mt. Dew, “The generalized, most basic premise is this: You have a substance that contains the broken down raw material. This is called mash, or sour mash. It can be of most anything you want, the most common is equal parts of cornmeal, to water, with active yeast added to start a chemical reaction which breaks down the starches in the corn meal.
This mixture has to sit for a selected period of time, which can vary, depending on the size of the batch, and what you’ve made it from. This is to allow the alcohol to form, and “ferment” the mixture.  After this process, the mash is pour into a large vat, or pot, and brought to a very VERY specific temperature. Water boils at around 212 °F, while ethanol boils at around 173 °F. Methanol, that can make you blind and is what you really want to avoid, boils around 148 °F.  So, you have to be specific in watching the temperature and controlling and monitoring it constantly.
The liquid is boiled and travels through a copper tube called a “worm”, which is usually coiled inside a box filled with ice or very cold water to condense the steam vapor back into liquid. When the first few drops of liquid come out, it is a general practice to throw the first couple shots away because they are the most likely to have contaminants.

“If you want to distill at home, I recommend the stove top method. There are plenty of informative websites now that can tell you how to build your own basic still from a coffee pot and styrofoam cooler. I would recommend you research it very diligently, and make sure you know what you’re doing before you start, simply because you can cause yourself, or a loved one to go blind, get nerve damage, and possibly death. It’s something I DO NOT recommend anybody doing, simply for the legality and health risk. Having said that, it can be fun and adventurous as you learn more about the craft and begin experimenting with different flavor combinations.”  A small kitchen batch can be run for about $50.
Distilling alcohol can be illegal, and selling untaxed whiskey is very illegal.
Who really wants legal whiskey?
While Mr. Mt. Dew has never been caught, he is well aware of some close calls.  ”There is a United States excise tax of $2.14 for every 750 ml of distilled alcohol, 80 proof or better. Compared to 21 cents for wine, and 5 cents for a can of beer. It is primarily illegal for this reason: lost United States government revenues. The other reasons they have listed are the possibility of contamination, bacterial and otherwise, from the home distilling process. It is legal to own and operate an alcohol still, but only with an ATF permit, and only for fuel.

I have never had too much trouble, as I didn’t get caught, haha, except for one time when I was 21. I ran the liquor in my van, and it got to a point that there was always a dark blue sedan or SUV following me when I drove that van. If I drove my small sedan, it was never there, but as soon as I hit the road in the van, there they were. So, at that point I quit for a while, and have only recently thought about starting back up.”

Not a big fan of straight white liquor?  Make a cordial out of it.  The most famous cordial,  and maybe the most historic, is Cherry Bounce.

It was a favorite of George and Martha Washington, and it greatly influenced North Carolina history.  While there’s tons of recipes, cherry bounce is basically liquor, sugar, and cherries. With this recipe, substitute white liquor for bourbon.  For a little extra kick, imbue your Bounce with magical intent as you make it and ferment it.  Say a chant every time you turn the jar.  ”Cherries pop, and cherries drop, but I’ll always bounce, bounce, bounce!” [My cherry bounce chirp.]

These folks bounce cherries:
Erotic Sensations
Tonia Brown:

Mr. Mt. Dew’s Drinking Song selections:

Melt Me!: Hot Wax Rituals, Giveaways, and Product Reviews

It’s time for a new round of giveaways and drawings.   This time there will be two, yes two, drawings.
First Drawing (April 13-May 13)
This drawing is open to anyone who is a PUBLIC follower of “The Barbed Pentacle” by May 13.  All of the names of my public followers will be placed into a hat, and someone other than myself will drawing out the lucky name.  If your name is drawn, you will win the Barbed Pentacle prize pack that includes a small strap from (perfect for discretion while traveling), and two wax play pillars, in Barbed Pentacle colors, from Erotic Sensations.
Second Drawing (April 13-May13)
This drawing is opened to any who contacts me via Facebook, Twitter, or Google+, or who emails me at  All you have to say is “enter me in the drawing”.  Click here for links.  The winner of this drawing will win a fabulous prize pack of hot pink, royal blue, and yellow pillar candles from  Erotic Sensations.

Erotic Sensations candles are really wonderful.  I product tested one, and I have to say, they blow dollar store candles out of the water.  The candle melts quickly, the wax is soft and velvety, and they are almost smokeless.  There was some slight redness left on my skin after play, but it dissipated with in a minute or two.  No burns at all!

What should you do with the candles that you win?  Add them to your rituals!  A whole section on Hot Wax Rituals  has been added to the BDSM ritual section.  Just scroll down until you get to Johnny Cash.  Happy waxing!

These folks wax before they ride:
Erotic Sensations
Tonia Brown

And One to GROW On!

It’s just not a birthday celebration if at least one person doesn’t impersonate Marilyn singing “Happy Birthday.”

“One to grow on, one to live on, one to eat on, one to be happy on, and one to get married on!”

It’s also not a birthday if at least one person doesn’t try to swat your ass.  Ever wonder where that tradition came from?  No, it wasn’t just some sick fucker trying to ruin a little kid’s day nor was it some kinky person trying to please their partner.  It actually started with the nameless ancients, who believed that evil spirits surrounded people at all times, especially on their birthdays.  These evil spirits were devious enough to want to make a birthday a death day.  In order to get rid of the evil spirits, the birthday person was spanked to drive away the evil.  With each swat, a prayer or blessing was said for the coming year, hence, “One to grow on.”  This belief was wide spread enough that many cultures, not just European/North American, have traditions of folks being somewhat brutalized on their birthdays.  As time went on and Christianity took hold, it was said that if a person wasn’t spanked at least once a year, that the soul was being softened up for Hell and that the body was being softened up for the grave.

There’s many ways that this quaint tradition that many of us remember from childhood can be given a magical hit.  The easiest method is to make sure that as you deliver the swats, whether light and playful or hard enough to be remembered for a few days, that you say those blessings for the coming year.  It’s like cakes and ale: “May you never hunger” and “may you never thirst.”  With out those blessings, you’re just eating and drinking in circle.  With out these blessings, you’re just smacking some ass.  You could use the traditional blessings stated above, or you could be thoughtful and write blessings specific to the birthday person’s situation.

You can also, as your hand connects with the other person, send nice energy to them, to sustain them for the coming year.  This energy would ideally back up your blessings for an extra magical boost.  If you’re not familiar with sending energy, just imagine that as your hand connects, nice warm light is transferred from your body to the other person.  Or, you could go one step further and not only say the blessing and transfer energy, but imagine what that blessing is actually saying.  For example, you would say “One to grow on”, send that nice energy into the person, and imagine the person growing physically, spiritually, and mentally.  Because of the possible complexities of this magical working, don’t feel like you have to rush the birthday spanking.  Just let it be nice and leisurely (and it’s their birthday, after all, so it SHOULD be fun!).

Number magic is another natural choice for a magical birthday spanking.  Since birthday spankings traditionally consist of the number of swats plus a few extras, numerology, tarot card numbering, Kabbalah numbering, and the I Ching can all be used in the magical working.  There are lots of different ways these various divinatory systems can be employed.  The simplest is to look up what the number of the person’s age represents.  Then, if it is an auspicious meaning, that meaning can become part of your intent with the spell as you deliver the blows–literally beating it into the recipient.  If the meaning is inauspicious, then your intent would be to beat into them things that would counter act the meaning.  You may even want to beat out a protective astral shield for them, in much the same way a black smith would have hammered out a metal shield, except you would be working with skin.

Another way to integrate number magic and divination into the spanking is to pay attention to the recipient’s reactions to your licks and divine their future for the year from that.  For example, if the recipient is fairly quiet up until lick number 7, when he/she whimpers or cries out or laughs, then the meaning behind that number (from whatever system you are using) would indicate their fortune for the year.

Birthday spankings are traditionally done with a bare hand, but that doesn’t mean that implements can’t be used, or my favorite–a hand gloved in leather.  If you’re interested in magic dealing with switches, check out the “Cut Me A Switch, Bitch” section in BDSM rituals.

Have fun as you administer your birthday spankings and receive them.  Remember, birthday spankings should be a safe, sane, and consensual adult event.  Don’t do anything stupid that will land you in jail or bring bad karma.
So, in closing:  Happy Birthday Booker T. Washington!  May we all be able to cast down our buckets where we are and be content with what we draw up!
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Squeeze My Melons and Plow My Furrow, Part 7: Guerrilla Gardening, Squatters’ Circles, and Urban Foraging

As anyone who has gardened knows, gardening is dirty work.  It’s sweaty, dirt gets under your nails, your hair gets messed up.  Sounds sort of like sex!  For me, gardening is a very sensual act.  You’re plowing furrows and fingering seeds into the warm, moist earth.

Gardening is also a very magical act.  The act lends itself well to sympathetic magic.  You can imbue your desires or intent into the seed and then plant it.  As it grows, so too should your intent or desire.
Magic can also be added to gardening by following the old traditions of planting by the signs.  There are two systems to take into consideration when planting by the signs.

System One is to plant by the phases of the moon.  New moon to Full moon is good for planting above ground crops and seeds and for digging new beds.  The Full moon is best for harvesting.  The Waning moon is best for weeding and pruning.  Root crops should be planted in the dark of the moon.  System One is the simplest system.

System Two is to plant by where the moon is in the Zodiac.  It’s more complicated than System One and requires the use of a Farmer’s Almanac.  System One and Two can be combined together, but it’s sometimes difficult to find compatible days. Just like with most magical workings, timing is important, and folks, especially Old Timers, will swear that plants do better when planted at the appropriate time.  If you can’t wait to dig into magical gardening, there are lots of good books out there, particularly by Kate West and Ellen Dugan.

What should you do in the garden when the moon’s in Scorpio?

For many people, myself included, gardening space is at a premium because they live in an urban or suburban environment.  Container, balcony, and rooftop gardening are all wonderful options, but so is Guerrilla Gardening.

Guerrilla Gardening is a concept that started in London to fill the empty, arable spaces in the city.  Some of the land was city owned, but most of it was vacant private lots.  The movement has now grown worldwide.

Except for the subversive nature of it, guerrilla gardening is not much different from regular gardening.  Both Wikihow and have step-by-step guides and tips for beginners.

Seed bombs are a common guerrilla gardener’s tool. Made from seeds, soil, and water, the bombs are made to be nonchalantly tossed into vacant lots and will burst open on contact.  They work best if they are made from seeds that do not have to be covered by soil to germinate.  Germination requirements can usually be found on the back of seed packages. Seed bombs are perfect for garden spells, especially if you are without a garden space.  First, figure out the proper timing for the spell.  Then, imbue your seeds with your intent and desires.  Your seeds should be representative of your intent.  To ensure this, consult correspondence charts or a language of flowers guide.  More than one type of seed can be added to the bomb to create a complex and longer lasting spell.  If you want, writing a chant to say while you make the bomb and at launch time will strengthen your magic.  Now choose your location. Ideally, it should be a location near something related to your spell intent or near you.

My god looks like Che!

When it’s time, travel to your launch site, and on the way invoke the God and Goddess to aid your seeds and desires to germinate and grow.  Now throw!  If you wrote a chant for the spell and you pass the site often, recite your chant every time you go by.  The more you put your intent out to the Universe, the more likely the Universe is to make it a reality.

In a way, guerrilla gardens are squatters.

Real squatters–not her–use unoccupied land without the owner’s permission.  Squatting is common everywhere, and every place has different rules about it.

Depending on your locality’s  laws, you may be able to make a guerrilla garden into an outdoor worship area.  Many urban and suburban Pagans don’t worship outdoors because they don’t have a piece of land to worship on.  Some Pagans utilize parks, but many don’t because of the number of people milling about.  However, with some strategic planting, lots of invisibility thoughts, and good site scouting, circle squatting is a much better option than the park.  Before you start your outdoor circle, make sure to research the laws in your area about squatting.  While you’re of course going to claim ignorance if a cop stops you, it’s always best to know beforehand where you stand legally.

Vacant lots and other “wild” urban and suburban places are also excellent for foraging and gleaning.  Foraging is when you gather edibles from the wild.  This can either be done along the marginally green areas

or in the wilds of the park.

There many good field guides available specifically geared toward foragers.  Make sure to get one that’s specific to your area.  Some easy foraging foods are fruits, dandelion greens, Queen Anne’s Lace tubers, wild strawberries, and nuts.  If you’re not sure if the plants you’re foraging from have been sprayed with chemicals, then leave them be. has an informative guide for beginner foragers.

Ruth gleaned a rich husband!

Gleaning is similar to foraging, except that it occurs in a cultivated setting.  Gleaners collect the produce that has been left behind by farmers and gardeners.  The produce may be slightly bruised, wind fallen, or simply left by a harvester.  Following old hospitality traditions, many farmer and gardeners will purposely leave behind a portion of their harvest.  There are many aid agencies and food banks that rely on armies of foragers to harvest the extras for the hungry.  However, there’s no reason why you can’t harvest for yourself.  Many cities now have websites and Facebook pages that have up-to-the minute information about where to get wind fall apples or forgotten tomatoes. is a good starting point for finding free food in your area.

Good food doesn’t have to be expensive, nor is a lack of land a good excuse for not growing your own food. Food grown by you tastes better, is healthier, and it puts you closer to the God and Goddess and their holy union.
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