You sucked too much helium, chipmunk!

Balloons are happy objects. They grace our homes at birthday parties and celebrations. They call our attention to great sales. They announce new babies born into a neighborhood. The shape of the traditional balloon calls to mind the blessed globes of the Venus of Willendorf and other fertility icons. For some people, balloons have inspired compassion, obsession, and kink. These folks are called “Looners,” and they fall into two camps: the poppers and the non-poppers.

While both groups revel in the deliciousness of balloons’ shapes, colors, and sexiness, the poppers get a great thrill that often teeters and falls over into orgasm when they pop a balloon. For them, the balloon’s ultimate purpose is to pop. The non-poppers show more compassion for the balloons and tend to personify them to the extent that they’ll often mourn when a balloon is popped. I personally am not a Looner, but if I were, I would be a popper. I can see how the anticipation and the loud noise can ignite certain emotions.

Here are some links that will expand your looner knowledge:

Sexually speaking, balloon sex could be interesting. It’s not something I have ever tried, but I’m really intrigued. Genitalia for both sexes can be made from the balloons that clowns use to make balloon animals. Here’s a link on making a pocket pussy from water balloons:  If you’re interested in free looner porn, check out this site:

Magically speaking, balloons have a lot of possibilities. First, you have what I like to call “Up, up and away” spells. These spells involve helium balloons. As with any magic, try to coordinate your correspondences for best results. In this case, you can coordinate colors and shapes (and sometimes messages) toward your intent. With “Up, up and away” spells, once you say your spell intention, tie an object that you either literally want out of your life or tie an object that represents something you want out of your life to the balloon, and you let it go. If the object is heavy, you’ll need several balloons. Make sure to release your balloons away from trees and power lines.

You can also adapt this type of spell to send messages/blessings out into the world or to specific people. Instead of your intent being “take out of my life,” the intent would be “take to the world” or “take to person X.” While these types of spells are fun, and this method of dispersion is used by all types groups, including religious groups to spread propaganda, these spells are not environmentally sound. The balloons, once they fall to the ground, contribute to litter, and balloon litter is dangerous to wildlife who may eat the balloon or get tangled in the string.

The second type of balloon magic is the “you made me wet” magic. Here again, color correspondences can be used to boost your magic. This type of magic can be used as a twist on anointing, or it can be worked into ritual in other ways. Fill biodegradable water balloons with water and a corresponding oil or ritual tea. If your purpose is to anoint, then recite your anointing words as you fill the balloons so that they become filled with your intent. Then throw the balloon at the person, people, or objects to be anointed. This method works really well for big objects like houses. If you don’t want to throw a balloon directly at a person, throw the balloon at the person’s feet. The balloon will still break upon impact with the ground, and the water and anointing material will spray up onto the person.

The third type of balloon spell is the “pop me” spells. With this type of spell work, take regular balloons that are color coordinated and fill them with air and herbs, unlit incense, oils, and/or coordinated by color and shape glitter and confetti. As you fill the balloons, fill them with your intent as well. When it’s time to release the energy from you spell, pop the balloon(s). One variant of this ritual can be turned into a balloon dance.

Multiple spell balloons, either with different components of your spell in them or complete balloons replicated for greater energy, can be attached all over your body. As you dance, more energy is gradually built up for your spell. When it’s time to start releasing the energy, you can start popping the balloons one at a time in traditional burlesque fashion, or if you’re doing this ritual with a partner or a group, then they can pop the balloons.

A twist on this type of spell is the balloon animal/shape. As with the above spell ideas, clown balloons can be filled with spell material and then twisted into a totem animal shape or a shape that corresponds to your spell. Another variant on this idea is calling the elements with balloons. Using the appropriate colors for your tradition (in my tradition it’s yellow=East, red=South, blue=West, and green=North), each quarter caller can fill his/her balloon with air as they welcome in the element. When it’s time to release the element, all you have to do is pop the balloon and say “thank you”.

Balloons have lots of applications for magic and um, other activities. As with anything, be responsible and think about how your spell method may impact the environment.

These folks get a rise from popping balloons:

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